Parent’s Communication with Children: 2 Ls & 2 Rs

Parent’s Communication with Children: 2 Ls & 2 Rs

By-Deepa Singh

The beautiful bond between parents and their children needs no verbal communication, its divine and eternal. Without speaking a single word one can express and understand the other. Children learn by observing the parents. The non-verbal communication (silent gestures and expressions) matters more than the verbal communication.  However, words are required when it comes to interact with the society (a wider world), where a parent need to teach and guide children to communicate with the environment and people.

As a renowned poet William Wordsworth in his poem ‘My Heart Leaps Up’ said “The child is the father of man.” Amazingly, I have learnt many good lessons from children. When it comes to communication, a child already learns basic tendencies of it while in womb. In outer world she only applies those learnings in practical. How parents handle the curiosity, learning desire and observations of the child decides how the child communicates this wide world.

The basic principle of 2 Ls and 2 Rs should be followed. Here 2 Ls means, Love & Listen and 2Rs means Respect & Reply. These four terms are corelated. Listen the child with love which motivate and encourage him to share. Respect the child while replying it gives him confidence and build self-esteem.

1.       Love: Children are hungry always for love. Parents should understand that their sweet shallow talks cannot fulfill the need. You may be preoccupied with your worldly affairs while talking to them and considering they do not realize the nothingness on your part as a communicator. Children look deep and direct into parents’ eyes for the love they want while talking. Children under age group 0-5 look more into parents’ eyes while communicating than the children of age group 6-12. The misconception leads the children away from being polite while communicating. Be a good parent and shower abundant of love over the child.

2.       Listen: A child knows how to use the first purpose of communication i.e. to express need, but she may not be able to express it with the affecting factors. Listen carefully not only the verbal but also the non-verbal. Sometimes things may be unsayable for her so, you understand those and teach a good way to express that. Being a parent, you can only explain her expression of need. Parents should be a good listener. Do not just hear them; listen to them carefully.

3.       Respect: Communication is a process between two parties i.e. speaker and listener. Parents and the children both are equally responsible for a good output of communication. Parents should respect and value the children. Use respectable verbal and nonverbal expressions.

4.       Reply: In the process of communication reply means the feedback. Parents should be careful to give a positive and clear feedback to the children. In present time families are nuclear, both parents are working, and life is stressed with overburden. This stress should not be reflected in your communication with children. When a child initiates the communication parents need to be careful to response wisely. Remember Child is observing you to follow the action in future.

Parents and children both involve themselves in fruitful communication by following the above strategy.

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